Out-Of-Context D&D Quotes: CD Edition

[Edge]

"O Shaundakul, I grant thee half a million lions and the request that you in your almighty wisdom send the next sevenscore travelers to visit Waterdeep to view the majesty of the world's largest ball of yarn."

[Atomic Twinkie]

Since it comes up:

"Yes he's mine. I don't know who the mother is. I got him from a separate or parallel plane in which an avatar or personification of death, not a deity but rather the occurance, made him in a bucket of water from a flower and gave him to me. And no, I'm not high."

[Edge]

"The worst part is, this is not the first time I've turned to Jerry Springer to solve a problem."

[Edge]

"Let's see, how many Torm symbols can I get on my outfit?"

"So... you can't keep his hands off of you?"

[Edge]

"Stop using my Snapple against me!"

[Deleted]

.... damn you Edge.

[Edge]

"The fuck's a Mammon?"
"It's a big elephant thing."

(Later...)

"It's an archfiend of greed and lust."
"... augh. Get it out of my head. Greedy horny elephants."

[Edge]

"Confession is on Thursday and Saturdays but I forgot last night because of worms."

[Edge]

"You should totally have the murderdoll steal the artifact."

[Deleted]

"Okay, that is NOT what I was thinking when you said magic stripper."

*singing* "Everyone loves Magical Stripper, 'cause the stripping she does is ever-so-clever."

[Edge]

"Kay, so headed out after this, and got facemelted by an attractive plague woman."

"Blind dates suck."

[Edge]

"That skirt's going to be awkward when you get goosed by a beholder."

[Deleted]

"I've got some very simple instructions on your character problem.

To Control Alts...Delete."

[Edge]

"I like splorch."

[Edge]

"It's like if James Bond had no social skills. ... so not like James Bond."