"I like you for..." Game

[Arya]

It is that time of the year when people are prone to feeling negative or are surrounded by those negative Nancies in their life. Whatever the reasons, it is just flatout difficult to find anything positive to say. While polite suggestions for improvement on something certainly have their place in our lives, we also need to remember the positives. Negativity going on long enough as we know creates a rather toxic environment.

Quite frankly, this is a lesson for me as much as anyone else.

So...I decided to start this thread, and invite others to play a game. This is the game of coming up with a positive thing or two to say about who posts last in this thread. That is the jist of the game. There are, however, just a few ground rules for this one so that people can get the best of this game.

Game House Rules

1. The "I like you for..." statement has to be purely nice and with positive regard to others. In other words, it cannot be a statement at the expense of another person (e.g., "I like you for you are mean to those [insert name or names] who deserve it and should not be around"). Be careful of making sure explanations are not belittling "certain groups." 

Bluntly put, putting others down even anonymously is not the point of the game, and really speaks more about the person making that statement than the person/people they are targeting. Truly. We want to encourage nice behavior here, not mean stuff!

2. Language used in your "I like you for..." sentence needs typed or framed positively. This is a positive psychology spin to the game. I will explain below. 

Example: "I like you for you are kind" versus "I like you because you are not a #$%#%#$." 

Example #2: "I like you because you are considerate, compassionate, and look for the best in others" versus "I like you because you are not inconsiderate, cruel, or looking for the worse in others." 

Rationale: One theory behind positive psychology is when we think about what to 'reduce' in others versus increase, we focus on the negative. The result of focusing on that negative is that we contribute to the creation or the perpetuation of the very things we want "less" of when we fixate on it! Mother Theresa once said she would never support an anti-war rally, but she would endorse a pro-peace one. She is onto something with that statement, I say.

There is actually research showing that if you provide positive reinforcement, even if the behavior change is minimal, you encourage that behavior to grow and become "more" versus "less." Businesses sometimes incorporate positive psychology in management styles because they find that when they capitalize on a person's strengths, tell them what they can do "more of" versus "less" while rarely saying what they do "less" of, there also is an improvement. Setting clear expectations of what you look for in a person versus overloading someone with a list of "do nots" gives them a clear goal and something they can do, versus the opposite. It sounds contrary to what we are often taught and encouraged. However, it works. 

3. You have to give the regard to the person who last posted, if that was not clear before! <3

4. Please keep the over all mood friendly! 

This should go without saying, but...I will put it here anyway so people are very clear on expectations. >.> 




*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *


Having gone over this, I will start us off. Since no one posted before me, I will address the community.

I like this community for being here and supporting story over game-mechanics and exclusivity. I have left the server before and there is always a chance I will do it again. However, I keep coming back because I believe in the message and spirit of the place. Fire Wraith at some point said that the whole point of this server is for people to play, and also enjoy playing what they want; to have fun. There was a time I felt unsafe here because no matter what meticulous work I put into a character concept or research I did, or justification I provided, there was a lot of hurtful things said, both before me as well as behind me. Harsh judgment was passed, and had stayed with me. To say I am not afraid of that anymore would be lying, but eventually, the negative aire clears and I have the room to just enjoy the place. Enjoy the community. 

I am a storyteller first, mechanic-and-rule oriented gamer second. Stories are more important to me than all else. 

I have been allowed to take on this attitude and this is why I play here. The most important rules are the golden one(s). That is my value.

So, thank you Cormyr-Dalelands, so, so much. :-)

Anyway! I said more than enough! Next person!

Sincerely,
Arya

[daphne]

Arya,

I like you...

For clever complexities of writing, characterization and plot.

And for always being there when I need positive support and reinforcement!

[realityjumper]

I like Silveryfeather  's way of creating in-depth multi-layered drama / non-drama that drives characters to explore facets of their personalities most would never consider!

And editing to follow the de-structions: Daphne inspired a LOT of Beryl's development over the years with her great forum RP for the Divine Seeker (aka: Pink Ranger). Thank you for making her intriguing!

[spamtastic1979]

I like realityjumper, she is a pretty awesome member of the community that always had made me feel welcome to be here in this great server.

[Ogre Time Yay]

I like TheGuyThatPlaysAsJames    because:
he r betch
and ho
fite me

[realityjumper]

You didn't follow rules either Ogre Time Yay! (I got you covered though!)

Spamtastic - you've brought an amazing dynamic of "Paythin" the way with his crazy mistakes. He's been so much fun to RP with! You're also a kind person outside of the game.


Ogretime - You helped formulate Lena into the whacky character she is and I love the dynamic between her and Hyde. I love the layers to Hydaro's personality. Your help with the cover art for my book is still so SO appreciated. Glad to have you as a friend!

[Ogre Time Yay]

RJ - Lena and Hydaro do make a great duo, and there aren't many other people I hang around with on CD anymore, aside from you and Val.

Val - It's nice for Hydaro to share father daughter murder time with Alia, together they piss off Lawful paladins everywhere!

JameJameGuy - u r not betch, u r not ho ._.

[Valimar Dragonbane]

Ogretime!  I agree, its always nice to have father-daughter murder time.  They need to do that again soon!

[Arya]

Ogretime: The extra names is nice, but not necessary for this game (even if appreciated I am sure!). The game requires focusing on the person who posted last. ;-)


Valimar: I love how you manage to tie 2nd edition lore with 3.5 in a way that supplements and enriches your characters, and managed to make a play-against-type sort not seen often in the server.


Sincerely,
Arya

[Eredruie]

I like Arya because... not only was she one of the first people to really reach out and welcome me (back) to the server in January, but she's been a fabulous OOC chatter friend, and a great person to play with. I enjoy our characters' chats and antics (silly and serious in equal measure!), and as a DM, Arya has helped me grow Shaan beyond all expectations by bringing in some fabulous creativity and drama - one event in particular had me crying my eyes out IRL because it was so emotional. It has truly been a joy

BFF <3

[lurkerabove]

I like Darvins  and stormofwrath because... You have consistently given me awesome story building RP with our characters together, have consistently given me fun -without- stirring up drama, and are -the- main reason I'm here on CD.

I like Eredruie  because... we seemed to gel almost instantly once we started RP and OOC chatter, and you've been a fun RP partner, and now have two concepts that totally click!

I like Misty  because... see Darvins above for awesome storybuilding RP and lack of drama, and you taught me that it is possible to build a concept that is both survivable for the module, and still faithful to the concept I want to build. I'm damn near convinced you could build anything to be bulletproof.

I like Arya Kalarathri  because... see Darvins above for storybuilding RP and lack of drama, your ability as a DM to make a serious tear-jerking story, and your patience and encouragement to get me here as well.

[Arya]

*Refereeing...*

Please do not count this post. Just a few notes of love!

Positive psychology spin rule! I know it is hard for some phrases, this is definitely not a shot at anyone.! Our society and our minds are so used to more negative talk. To use most recent example...

"Free/lack of drama" can be reframed as...

"Abundance of positive interactions and keeping the game cool, good sportly over all, and fun loving while communicating issues to proactively make and maintain good relations."

You can even say just one of those things above. Or your own rewording but sans 'negative' language (this is mathematical 'negative' language, like 'less,' 'lack,' or 'reduce'). This is just an example. :-) This is a rule for me as much as anyone else.

And again, post on the person who last posted is all that the rules ask for, though there is no rule against additionals. The newest post in the thread (sans this one, since this is referee post!). Unless you enjoy doing the extra work. Then that is fine too. *Wink.* 

<3 you all!

*/Refereeing.*

[Darvins]

I like feck it I like all of you, because we all make this server that has been my addiction for far too many years now. So there we go, even when our characters disagree it just adds to the story, and seriously recently my addiction to this server has just been growing so it's all down to you folks.

[Nokteronoth]

I like you, Darvins, for being cheerful and friendly every time I see you, even if our characters don't interact a whole ton. You've always been really inclusive when I've been about, with Iyanna or Valar or Erliza. (I haven't seen Caine or Galdern much!)

~BR

[Garage Trashcan]

I like you because of witty banter and going to kill things and take their stuff.

I'm a simple man.